Part One

Bob, Steve, and Bujumbura :
One Man... One Partner... one half ant-lion half manatee um thing...
Three crime stoppin' S.O.B.s

Cut to a smoky office filled with decaying desk sets and windows that filter out any of the giddy parts of the sun.

Two feet of long, golden locks enter the room, riding on top of one of the softest faces you've ever seen. She had on a red dress that couldn't have followed her curves better than if she was born in it, and her legs flowed out the bottom in a way that just made you want to slap a hobo, cause you needed that money for booze too.

Sultry Lady Figure: "Is this the P.I. office?"

Steve: "No this is 3.142, 3.141 is just down the hall."

SLF: "What?"

Bob: "How can we help you?"

SLF: "It's my husband, he's gone missing. He left for work at Old Man Jenkins's advanced weapons research facility yesterday morning, and hasn't come back since. He's very absent minded and I think his head might be stuck somewhere."

Bujumbura: "Waahhollluuuuuuu ahha ahha scauuuuuuu?"

SLF: "Yes, he's worked there for several years now as a physicist wrangler."

Steve: "Well ma'am, we aren't actually detectives, we just broke in a tickled the guy in the office until he ran out in the hall. He should be back any minute."

SLF:"Please you must help me, I don't know where else to go!"

Steve: "The polic..." Bob breaks in: "Well take it!"

Bob: "Did your husband have any enemies, a comically over dramatic arch nemesis perhaps?"

SLF: "Well there is Dr. Bojangles, they've been rivals they were in the physics wrangling department together in college. Sure, he sends us death threats every now an then and will leave the occasional dead animal hanging in a yard, but I doubt he would do anything."

Bob:"It sounds like we need to give this Dr. Bimjingles a little visit"

Steve: "You mean Bojangles?"

Bob: "We'll get some chicken on the way so you can cram your gullet tub tub, but we need to be thinking about this woman's breast... I mean wings.... I mean husband. To the balding-middle-aged-failure-of-a-detective mobile!"

Steve: "But where are the keys?"

BUM BUM BUUUUMMMMMM

To be contiued...

"Oh here they are"